What’s a man to do?

You’ve probably realised that women tend to be different to men when it comes to love (besides from the obvious anatomy) and that most men are not good at understanding women, let alone love.

A good friend who was dating told us he was just going to be himself and if a woman liked him that was “great” and if not “it wasn’t meant to be”. The problem was that it took us years to get to know him, who he really was and how loving and caring a person he is. So how could he expect a potential partner to realize that in a date or two? How could he show that he was strong, yet sensitive – and more?

Here are 10 tips that helped him and can help MEN FIND LOVE.

To change you need to realise that you might have to change a few things; or more accurately expand your way of thinking and what you do.

Author and pick-up guru Neil Strauss proffers to men that they should learn to become, and demonstrate, that they are the most interesting person in a room in order to interest potential partners. A big part of this is showing that they understand intangible things, such as love.

Tip 1   We’re all attracted to and want to be with people who make us feel good. That’s why you like being with your mates, they make you feel good. When it comes to your partner, do you currently make her feel good about herself? Answer truthfully. If not, can you? Of course you can! You’re a big strong man and can do anything.

Your partner most likely wants to feel that she’s the most important person, not just woman, in your life. This means that she would most likely appreciate being told that you care for her, that you love her, that you’re there for her – always. Speak up and say something nice. Don’t think it’s a matter of not saying anything.

Some men have learnt that they can’t seem to say the right words to the women in their life. So they end up saying very little, if anything at all – especially nothing complimentary or deep and never how they feel. Well, this might be the biggest mistake you’re currently making.

It’s an easy one to fix. What you actually need to do is to say lots! Giving loving words, appreciation, is important. It’s how you give energy. You need to tell your partner that you love her, what you love most about her – there has to be something about her that you still like, even if it’s you just saying what you like the most about her physical appearance. Tell her what you find sexy about her. Then move onto those aspects of her personality that you appreciate. What attracted you to her in the first place? It’s probably still there. These words need to be heartfelt. Words without feeling won’t do it.

You can also show appreciation by giving in other ways, such as giving chocolates, flowers or jewellery.

But remember, these are physical things and while they might help a little it’s the intangible things that work best. (Recall how energy doesn’t flow in physical things, it’s stored.

For the other nine tips see the free e-book here 

A business-like approach to love

A head-hunter friend of ours, who teaches big companies that when they’re recruiting people they should hire those who best fit their culture, who embody the ideals of the organization.
She coaches them on how to employ people who are prepared to work together with others to achieve a common objective. They might not have the same personality type, not even the same views, but they are able to band with others and work together.
Look at potential partners in this way:
– do they have similar ideals to you;
– do they think of others and work together with them?
– do they take control and direct or do everything on their own?
Ask them what their views are on love, on true love, and how they’ve gone about finding it?
Do they have the same ideals and approach as you?
Love is not as scarce a commodity as it has often been made out to be. There’s plenty of love energy to go around. We all want it. We all have it to give.
So turn the traditional approach to finding love around and start by looking ‘top’ down. It’s the person inside, their soul, that you’re trying to determine how they might connect with yours. True love is where you connect with another on all levels – physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually (in terms of energy rather than religion).
Download the free book now – it’s just a click away – no registration required.

What's on your list?

Do you realise that you have a whole range of emotional needs?
Willard Harley suggests you look for someone who can provide you with:
• Admiration
• Affection
• Conversation
• Domestic support
• Family commitment
• Financial support
• Honesty and openness
• Physical attractiveness
• Sexual fulfilment
• Recreational companionship.
He adds a relationship has a better chance of not only surviving, but thriving, if you and your partner each rank these in the same order of priority.
Meanwhile, author and psychologist Gordon Livingstone suggests there are 10 virtues that we seek in our partners. They include:
• Kindness
• Optimism
• Courage
• Loyalty
• Tolerance
• Flexibility
• Beauty
• Humour
• Honesty
• Intelligence.
Do you have them in you? Do you see all of them in your partner?
Find out more about them in the free book – can you find it on the site?

Get technical

Let’s get technical for a moment. What type of partner do you really want, what attributes attract you? Do you have a list of what you’re seeking? Does it include the practical as well as passionate aspects of love?
Most people’s lists contain physical attributes they desire, such as physical looks, in a potential partner.
That’s fine, if all you want is a physical relationship!  Read that again!
Does your list include any mental attributes; such as wanting a companion who can converse and is caring, warm, loving?
Does it include any spiritual ones? If not, why not?
A better approach is to turn this around and list what you have to offer a potential partner.
What do you think is your best physical attribute? What’s your best emotional attribute, your best mental and spiritual features? Would a potential partner be able to easily recognise these? Why not? What would a potential partner love most about you right now? Is this what you want to be loved for? Do you want someone with similar attributes? What do you have to give them right now?
Do you have love to give?
Or are you giving love to get love?
If so, stop! You can’t force love energy to flow towards you.
If you ‘need’ love, it’s not a love that’s expanding, flowing or balanced – it’s not true love.
Rather, you’re trying to fill a gap in the energy within you or balance your own energy. Once you realise that, you can fill that gap and move on.
Need help – just down load the free e-book and learn lots more practical tips on how!

Happy Valentine's Day

Where ever you are this Valentine’s Day remember that you are loved.
There is always someone who loves you!
Maybe not as and as much as you’d like…
…which is why we wrote out book – so that you can find the love you deserve without making the mistakes we did.
Download it now here and get started on the journey – or reread it if you have already downloaded.
Love – Kris & Guy.

Our most important blog

SECRET #1
One of the biggest, yet unrecognised, challenges for many people today is how to meet their human need for self esteem.
This need was recognised by Abraham Maslow in his famous pyramid of human needs, needs that we each need fulfilled in our life. It was ranked the fourth highest/second highest need.
And many of us are struggling with it today!
Many people think it is ‘ego’, but that is incorrect.
Others think they can fulfil their need for self-esteem by buying a fancy handbag, shoes, clothes or other branded item to suggest that they have ‘made it’, that they are better than others.
Increasing population, urbanisation and overall competition sends many people along the path that they have to be better than others, that they have to be near the ‘top’ (what ever that means to them) to have self esteem.
Sooner or later they realise that is not enough.
Others serve people, be good, etc to try and feel better about themselves, to achieve positive self esteem.
But true self-esteem is where we/you feel good about yourself.
It is where you know are worthwhile.
Branded goods do not do that.
It can only be achieved by others recognising and reiterating that you are a worthy person.
And the people who care for you are the ones who are most important in this respect.
Accordingly, you need a partner who says such – says that you are a worthy, a great individual.
This is a major aspect of true love. One that makes you feel even more loved.
Does your lover do that?
Do you for your friends, family, loves, partner?
YOU SHOULD!
Find out more secrets about true love -download the book now (it’s free as we want to share the secrets to love that we have found).

When?

What’s the optimum number of dates? Or when is the optimum time to settle down?
It’s not age, not even number of partners but rather the amount of knowledge you have about love that’s most important.
If you know and understand what love is, especially why you want love, then you can more quickly assess potential partners. You can more quickly determine – and decline – those whom won’t work out, allowing you more time to spend with those who might. This can also help you avoid staying in relationships that are not right for you.
Knowing about love provides a competitive advantage. You are less likely to choose the ‘wrong’ person and have to try again, or remarry, when you’re older. For example, if you choose someone early on without enough comparison you may one day meet someone who has those qualities that you dreamt of, and you’ll resent the partner you’re with. (There are, of course, examples that are the exception to this, such as successful arranged marriages and the like.)
You’d research, learn, inspect and do tests before you bought an expensive car or house – so why wouldn’t you do the same before choosing a life partner?
Learn more about love – here – these holidays.

The science of finding true love

Finding the ‘right’ partner is key to the quality, and even length, of your life. This one decision can determine 90 percent of your happiness – or misery. So it’s important to get it right.
So how do you find the right partner, your soul mate?
Here’s what you’ve been missing, the key we discovered that can help you find your soul mate.
It’s that your soul is related to the way energy flows within you and therefore finding your soul mate is a matter of finding someone with whom your energy best connects!
A soul mate adds to and amplifies your energy – and your energy theirs.
Unfortunately, you cannot easily ‘see’ how your energy could connect when assessing potential partners. It will vary from person to person and only you can sense and determine this.
As soon as you look beyond the physical you will see, be attracted to and meet, a lot more people who could be a good match for you.
There are many people who could be a great energy fit for you.
There are almost 7 billion people on the planet, which means that there are hundreds if not thousands of people with whom your energy could connect well.
This means you are not looking for “the one”, not looking for a needle in a haystack. There are likely to be several potential partners that you can relate with and grow love with!
This also means that you don’t have to compete for the same person as your friends.
To find someone with whom you can experience true love requires real contact and connection. Unfortunately, many of us are more comfortable writing short texts or emails to one another, rather than having a real conversation or contact with another person. But avoiding actual contact by hiding behind a computer isn’t the answer.
You need to get out and meet real people to see with whom your energy meshes best.
Download the free book to find out more….
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Love and pain

One of the best ways to address pain is to determine how your energy is flowing. You can determine this by considering your emotions and what they’re try to tell you.
Emotions are energy in motion (e-motion) and compel you to take action to try to make your energy flow better. They are electromagnetic ‘tags’ that you add to your perceptions, thoughts and memories.
Is an emotion trying to tell you something right now? When you feel a strong emotion, stop and figure out what the increased energy flow (or blockage) is trying to inform you.
Ask yourself questions that will help identify emotions, such as why you were angry or fearful in the first place, why you were unable to be more ‘loving’. What stopped your energy flowing harmoniously? Was it something real or your perception?
image-2Find a way to replace them with healthier emotions, with a better flow of energy (see more in the free book on how to do this – download it easily now).
The laws of science show that things balance-out over the long-term; so if you’ve had a hard time and felt down lately prepare for things to rebound and improve. If your past has been ‘bad’ your future can be good. (Though you might have to learn how to change what you’ve done previously so that things can change in the future.)
While it can be hard to leave behind baggage and heal the hurt we’ve each experienced and have inside, embrace what has been and how it has made you stronger. For example, if you are stuck in the past, stuck on a previous relationship, consider why. What did you get out of it that you don’t have now and need? Then consider what is required for you to ‘move on’.
Rather than be afraid and do nothing, do the opposite – do something. The wheel of life will continue to turn: it is up to you to move and grow with it – or struggle against it (using lots of energy to do so). So use times of change and endings to restart, to try again. There is a saying that “sometimes life gives you a shakeup to help you wake up”.