– thanks to the World Future Society.
Do you realise that you have a whole range of emotional needs?
Willard Harley suggests you look for someone who can provide you with:
• Domestic support
• Family commitment
• Financial support
• Honesty and openness
• Physical attractiveness
• Sexual fulfilment
• Recreational companionship.
He adds a relationship has a better chance of not only surviving, but thriving, if you and your partner each rank these in the same order of priority.
Meanwhile, author and psychologist Gordon Livingstone suggests there are 10 virtues that we seek in our partners. They include:
Do you have them in you? Do you see all of them in your partner?
Find out more about them in the free book – can you find it on the site?
Let’s get technical for a moment. What type of partner do you really want, what attributes attract you? Do you have a list of what you’re seeking? Does it include the practical as well as passionate aspects of love?
Most people’s lists contain physical attributes they desire, such as physical looks, in a potential partner.
That’s fine, if all you want is a physical relationship! Read that again!
Does your list include any mental attributes; such as wanting a companion who can converse and is caring, warm, loving?
Does it include any spiritual ones? If not, why not?
A better approach is to turn this around and list what you have to offer a potential partner.
What do you think is your best physical attribute? What’s your best emotional attribute, your best mental and spiritual features? Would a potential partner be able to easily recognise these? Why not? What would a potential partner love most about you right now? Is this what you want to be loved for? Do you want someone with similar attributes? What do you have to give them right now?
Do you have love to give?
Or are you giving love to get love?
If so, stop! You can’t force love energy to flow towards you.
If you ‘need’ love, it’s not a love that’s expanding, flowing or balanced – it’s not true love.
Rather, you’re trying to fill a gap in the energy within you or balance your own energy. Once you realise that, you can fill that gap and move on.
Need help – just down load the free e-book and learn lots more practical tips on how!
What’s the optimum number of dates? Or when is the optimum time to settle down?
It’s not age, not even number of partners but rather the amount of knowledge you have about love that’s most important.
If you know and understand what love is, especially why you want love, then you can more quickly assess potential partners. You can more quickly determine – and decline – those whom won’t work out, allowing you more time to spend with those who might. This can also help you avoid staying in relationships that are not right for you.
Knowing about love provides a competitive advantage. You are less likely to choose the ‘wrong’ person and have to try again, or remarry, when you’re older. For example, if you choose someone early on without enough comparison you may one day meet someone who has those qualities that you dreamt of, and you’ll resent the partner you’re with. (There are, of course, examples that are the exception to this, such as successful arranged marriages and the like.)
You’d research, learn, inspect and do tests before you bought an expensive car or house – so why wouldn’t you do the same before choosing a life partner?
Learn more about love – here – these holidays.
What type do you want?
You already know physical love, as it’s the type you see all around you everyday, on television, in books and in movies.
When you’re young, you’re attracted to physical attributes of people, to looks and bodies and spend a great amount of time and effort trying to explore these.
Also, there’s no denying the power of the physical biology of love: our bodies are designed to reproduce. You were likely taught about this at school and gossiped about it with friends.
Marketers also use this type of love to sell things to you, so you have this type of love pushed to you all the time. You’re led to believe that you must have it or you’re missing out and will suffer. This has also distorted much thinking about love.
Once you experience and somewhat understand the physical aspects of love, you might realise that there’s something more, that there’s a ‘mental’ or social form of love.
Mental love is where you want loving companionship, conversation and friendship as much, if not more, than the physical aspects of love. It’s why and how you seek relationships with friends, family and a special partner.
While physical love fulfils our physical and biological needs, mental love helps alleviate loneliness, makes you feel more connected, safer and secure.
This type of love has a lot to do with how you feel and think. Studies have found that just mentally recalling thoughts of a loved one can create pleasant feelings; that meditating about love can generate more harmonious heart waves (ECGs) than people who are simply resting.
Once you obtain mental love you might sense that there’s still something more. For example, you can be in a relationship, in a marriage with children, and never be physically alone, yet still feel isolated and that something is missing.
What’s missing is spiritual love…
What’s a man to do when it comes to love – lot’s actually.
For instance, don’t be controlling. Some men think strong means control. It doesn’t.
Control kills relationships. Many men try to control what they don’t understand, especially their emotions (as well as their women).
Love is not about control, rather the opposite: love energy needs to flow and expand.
When you take control, you show that you don’t listen. When you ask for sex, you place conditions on your partner, your relationship and your love. You end up with the romantic version of love, where you are attached to things, rather than true love.
If you see there’s an attachment to something, such as shopping, shoes or the like, the energy flow has become attached and conditional. It’s probably because they make your woman feel better about herself.
Many people do and buy things to make themselves feel better. If this seems to be to excess, this is a sign that you’re not doing enough to make your partner feel good about themself.
They’re having to do, buy and acquire other things to do that.
Ask your partner why she needs these physical objects. Ask more, probe further and deeper, as to what you can do to make her feel good about her self? She might not even know. But she should appreciate the fact that you’re trying the let energy flow, expanding it; expanding yourself and your relationship.
Find out more in the free e-book. Get it here now for a limited time.
Everything, including love, changes throughout your life.
You’ll progress through different stages and as you do your relationships and love will change too.
There are at least four phases you might progress through. These include:
• Student phase – during which you learn about yourself and the world, where your energy expands from physical to mental
• Family and social phase – where you comprehend meaning from what you’ve learnt, where your energy expands and connects
• Contribution phase – where you apply the information you’ve learnt, where you give energy
• An integration phase – where you integrate yourself, and your energy, with the world around you.
These phases involve a transition from a focus on the physical, to the emotional then to the mind, spirit and finally to love.
These changes can take time or be quite quick. For instance, there may come a time in your life that you will go through what Wayne Dyer calls a “shift”, where you move from a focus on physical and social aspects of life to something more spiritual and loving. This is sometimes called a mid-life crisis.
At this time priorities change. For some, this is a shift from focusing on the family, on trying to be good enough and fitting in to a greater focus on personal growth, improving self esteem, spirituality, happiness and forgiveness. For men, it’s a shift from focusing on creating wealth, adventure, achievement, pleasure and obtaining respect to focusing on spirituality, personal peace, family, finding purpose and emotional honesty with themself.
There are also phases of love that you may progress through. We’ve found there are five main phases:
• Compassion – true love.
To find out more about these phases download your free copy while you can.
Finding the ‘right’ partner is key to the quality, and even length, of your life. This one decision can determine 90 percent of your happiness – or misery. So it’s important to get it right.
So how do you find the right partner, your soul mate?
Here’s what you’ve been missing, the key we discovered that can help you find your soul mate.
It’s that your soul is related to the way energy flows within you and therefore finding your soul mate is a matter of finding someone with whom your energy best connects!
A soul mate adds to and amplifies your energy – and your energy theirs.
Unfortunately, you cannot easily ‘see’ how your energy could connect when assessing potential partners. It will vary from person to person and only you can sense and determine this.
As soon as you look beyond the physical you will see, be attracted to and meet, a lot more people who could be a good match for you.
There are many people who could be a great energy fit for you.
There are almost 7 billion people on the planet, which means that there are hundreds if not thousands of people with whom your energy could connect well.
This means you are not looking for “the one”, not looking for a needle in a haystack. There are likely to be several potential partners that you can relate with and grow love with!
This also means that you don’t have to compete for the same person as your friends.
To find someone with whom you can experience true love requires real contact and connection. Unfortunately, many of us are more comfortable writing short texts or emails to one another, rather than having a real conversation or contact with another person. But avoiding actual contact by hiding behind a computer isn’t the answer.
You need to get out and meet real people to see with whom your energy meshes best.
Download the free book to find out more….