A key love secret

Shift the focus in your life from yourself, beyond your family and friends, to your partner – and if you do that while also shifting the focus from physical things to intangible love – you have a much better chance of developing true love.
The secret is relatively easy to do: focus on your energy, the power, of love.
As Mother Teresa suggested it isn’t what you do, but the amount of love that you do it with that counts most. Or as musician John Lennon said, it matters not whom you love or how you love, only that you love.

At some stage in your life you’ll reach a point where what’s most important to you is your own personal growth. Yes, that’s right, you’ll ultimately want validation that your life has been worthwhile and has meaning.
We have found this validation is the basic pivotal point – the crux – that determines whether a relationship will survive, die or flourish into true love.
This is what you are seeking to determine when you are dating – whether you realise it or not – and assessing potential partners or evaluating an existing relationship.
If you’re in a relationship and your partner lets you grow – even if they don’t actively encourage it – you’ll most likely remain with them. You might do this even if they exert control over or abuse you. Whereas if they blatantly hinder or stop your personal growth you’ll most likely seek to escape.

A problem is that we often we seek other people, things and even objects, to help us grow. This is why working and having children are such a big part of life; they provide a form of validation, of worthiness, of meaning – and do so better than most other approaches.
The only other thing that validates each of us more, makes life more meaningful, is love.
If you have a partner who validates you, appreciates you and what you do then you have an extraordinary love, a true love.

If your partner is not doing this for you, and this is where many relationships run into trouble, then you may begin to resent them.
You may even seek someone whom you feel or think validates you, seemingly makes your life more worthwhile.

Do you seek a partner, or want your current partner if you have one, to do this for you – to accept you, approve you and solve your problems for you?
Most of us want this, as it make us feel worthy.

Untitled

There’s a beautiful story that tells how a man and a woman randomly pass each other on a street and how they each have an overpowering intuition that the other is the perfect partner for them. As they do a double-take of their emotions, they turn around and look back at each other; and when they see one another looking at the other they each smile. They somehow muster the strength to mouth the word “hello’, then the courage to stop and speak to one another. They end up walking and talking. They get along perfectly. It seems too perfect, too good to be true. Their own self-doubts creep into the conversation. So to make sure they’re supposed to truly be together they decide to part without exchanging contact details and let fate decide if they meet again. They agree that if their paths do cross again that they’ll marry on the spot. Days pass, weeks pass and turn into months and then years as they don’t pass each other. They eventually go out with other people; others who are not their true love, but who provide some sort of romantic love. Many years later they pass each other on the street again. But so much time has gone by and things have changed that they don’t even recognise one another. Their moment, their chance to connect and live a life of true love had passed.

The story, initially by Japanese author Haruki Murakami, has changed a bit in the translation but still highlights how you have to be brave, to trust your intuition, to smile. You have to get out and have the courage to speak to someone whom may be the love of your life. If you don’t, you’ll never know if they were.

If you act and speak up only to find that person isn’t the love of your life you’ve probably still learnt something and better know what you’re looking for in a partner.

You’ll walk by many such people in life, people that you’re not just attracted to physically; people with whom you sense there’s something more. Turn around and smile. Also, make contact with your eyes. Eye contact is very important – the eyes are often referred to as the window into a person’s soul.

How do you know?

Once you’ve found someone how do you really know you’ve found the ‘right’ person?
We’ve found signs include:

  • Wanting to give love unconditionally to your partner
  • Providing a safe and secure environment and supporting them through good and bad times
  • Being able to talk, and listen, together for hours
  • Sharing your inner most self, your hearts
  • Having similar attitudes and aims
  • Encouraging your partner to be themselves and being able to accept who they are
  • Realizing that every aspect of you meshes or ‘clicks; with and adds to that of your partner
  • Together you explore, discover, learn, experience and achieve much more than you could on your own
  • You are separate, but integrated, adding to each other’s energy, life and love; and
  • Your love is better than the songs and movies you used to associate with love.

Learn more, much more about finding your true love in the free ebook – right here!

Love in 2021

Are you ready for love in 2021?
Everything, including love, changes throughout your life.
You’ll progress through different stages and as you do your relationships and love will change too.
There are at least four phases you might progress through. These include:
• Student phase – during which you learn about yourself and the world, where your energy expands from physical to mental
• Family and social phase – where you comprehend meaning from what you’ve learnt, where your energy expands and connects
• Contribution phase – where you apply the information you’ve learnt, where you give energy
• An integration phase – where you integrate yourself, and your energy, with the world around you.
These phases involve a transition from a focus on the physical, to the emotional then to the mind, spirit and finally to love.

Find out more about these stage, along with lots of practical tops on how to find love – all free. Click here. 

SPECIAL offer

As a bonus to our followers, please find a link to a complimentary copy of our other book – The Ultimate Meaning of Life.
Hope it helps you as it has helped many others.
Click here to download.

A business-like approach to love

A head-hunter friend of ours, who teaches big companies that when they’re recruiting people they should hire those who best fit their culture, who embody the ideals of the organization.
She coaches them on how to employ people who are prepared to work together with others to achieve a common objective. They might not have the same personality type, not even the same views, but they are able to band with others and work together.
Look at potential partners in this way:
– do they have similar ideals to you;
– do they think of others and work together with them?
– do they take control and direct or do everything on their own?
Ask them what their views are on love, on true love, and how they’ve gone about finding it?
Do they have the same ideals and approach as you?
Love is not as scarce a commodity as it has often been made out to be. There’s plenty of love energy to go around. We all want it. We all have it to give.
So turn the traditional approach to finding love around and start by looking ‘top’ down. It’s the person inside, their soul, that you’re trying to determine how they might connect with yours. True love is where you connect with another on all levels – physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually (in terms of energy rather than religion).
Download the free book now – it’s just a click away – no registration required.

WISHING YOU LOVE IN 2019

Do you ‘need’ love?
If so, it’s not a love that’s expanding, flowing or balanced – it’s not true love.
Rather, you’re trying to fill a gap in the energy within you. Once you realize that, you can fill that gap and move on.
To move on, to turn your love life around, turn around your focus on love.
Don’t focus on getting it, focus on giving it!
A major part of this secret is to realize that progressing from romantic towards true love is not about getting more love, not even doing more things to get love for your self, but about giving love!
The way to do this is to find the love energy that you already have within you and help it flow outwards towards others in the most harmonious way possible. That energy is there within you, somewhere.
Realize there’s more than the physical in front of you, more than the mental and emotional elements inside of you. There’s also the power of love. Tune into it and realize what you are capable of.
If you can give love, then you have something to offer potential partners (or keep an existing partner with you).
You’ll have something that can attract true love to you. For example, one reason most people want love is so that they can feel better. If you can make other people feel better, happier, loved for whom they are, they’ll want to be with you.
What sort of love are you giving now?
Find out many more secrets to true love in the ebook – free to download for a limited time…

How to handle the pain of love

Emotions – such as pain – are energy in motion (e-motion) and try to compel you to take action. Is an emotion trying to tell you something right now?
When you feel a strong emotion, stop and figure out what it is trying to tell you. Ask yourself questions, such as why you are angry or fearful in the first place, why you were unable to be more ‘loving’. Was it something real or your perception.
Once you recognise what information that emotion, that energy, is trying to communicate to you, you can then do something about it. Energy is neither good nor bad; it’s how energy patterns build upon one another or become chaotic that makes you perceive something as good or bad, pleasurable or painful. Find a way to replace them with healthier emotions, with a better flow of energy.
The laws of science show that things balance-out over the long-term; so if you’ve had a hard time and felt down lately prepare for things to rebound and improve. If your past has been ‘bad’ your future can be good. (Though you might have to learn how to change what you’ve done previously so that things can change in the future.)
While it can be hard to leave behind baggage and heal the hurt we’ve each experienced and have inside, embrace what has been and how it has made you stronger. Then consider what is required for you to ‘move on’.
Remember attachment stops energy flowing and (as Buddha said) attachment creates suffering. Emotions and love need to flow.
The ‘flow’ of love is a key, a major secret to finding it. Learn more, much more. Download the book – free for a limited time.

Untitled

Author and psychologist Gordon Livingstone suggests there are several virtues that we seek in our partners. They include:

  • Kindness
  • Optimism
  • Courage
  • Loyalty
  • Tolerance
  • Flexibility
  • Beauty
  • Humour
  • Honesty

Do you have them in you?
Do you see all of them in your partner?
The biological anthropologist Helen Fisher also suggests that  understanding who you are is key to understanding to whom you’re attracted.
For more checklists, read the free-ebook on our site. ENJOY!