Where’s the focus of your love?

Can you grow and expand your love to something beyond the physical, beyond the emotional, beyond the mental to something greater, to true love?
True love is not just about being with someone, not just about reproducing and building a family. It’s about realising the greatest aspects of life, in you, in your partner and in your relationship.
The chart below shows the shift from physical love, to where most marriages become stuck, to true love – and what’s required to obtain it.
This shows that if you shift the focus in your life from yourself, beyond your family and friends, to your partner and your relationship – and if you do that while also shifting the focus from physical things to intangible love – you have a much better chance of developing true love.
The secret is easy: focus on your energy, the power, of love.
Don’t demand love, don’t do things for love.
Rather nurture love – by giving it, unconditionally.
Be love.
As Mother Teresa suggested it isn’t what you do, but the amount of love that you do it with that counts most.
Or as musician John Lennon said, it matters not whom you love or how you love, only that you love…
Can you? Do you?
Sending you our love for a better 2022!

So you think you are a good lover? Try this quick quiz!

Did you fall in love because your partner is your ‘other’ half or because they complete you?  These ‘halves’ are often attributes you’ve not developed in your self. So ask yourself:

  • are you loved for who you are?
  • does your partner encourage your personal growth?

The latter is the single main element we have found that breaks or makes relationships; that can alter the balance from staying in one to wanting to run away.
At some stage in your life you’ll reach a point where what’s most important to you is your own personal growth (not some possession, not work, not even children). Yes, that’s right, you’ll ultimately want validation that your life has been worthwhile and has meaning.
We have found this validation is the basic pivotal point – the crux – that determines whether a relationship will survive, die or flourish into true love.
This is what you are seeking to determine when you are dating and assessing potential partners or evaluating an existing relationship.
If you’re in a relationship and your partner lets you grow (even if they don’t actively encourage it ) you’ll most likely remain with them. However, if your partner doesn’t help you in your personal growth your relationship may run into trouble. If they blatantly hinder your growth you’ll most likely grow to resent them.
A problem is that many people often we seek others to help them grow. This is why working and having children are such a big part of life; they provide a form of validation, of worthiness, of meaning – and do so better than most other approaches. The only other thing that can validate you more is love – being loved for who you are!
If you have a partner who validates you, appreciates you and what you do, then you have an extraordinary love – a true love. This encouragement of you by your partner is the greatest difference between romantic love and true love. It’s where true love blossoms.

Learn even more

While we write about true love being much more than the physical aspects of love, we all need to know more about those aspects – as the review of this book explains ( https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-9597313/How-join-summer-sexplosion-expert-puts-womens-pleasure-first.html )

Then come back to learn even more here.

 

The difference between love and true love

A key to finding true love is to expand beyond the basics, beyond the physical.
Expand to the mental, relate and connect on a mental level.
Then take it further and expand into the spiritual.

How do you do that?
For example, rather than try to change your partner, expand into areas where you can reconnect.
Focus on the energy; your energy, your partner’s energy and how it relates and interacts between you. Is it flowing between you, expanding, balancing?
Whatever the case, you can give more love energy, more consideration, more connection, more self worth, more encouragement, more of you.

Be the hero of your own relationship, to not only save it, but to take it to another level.
It’s worth giving it a try. If you succeed you can lift your relationship towards the comfort, warmth and joy of true love.

Here are some tips:
Often we seek things in a relationship that we’re missing from our self. If you ‘need’ someone to ‘complete’ you, to provide you with a ‘better half’, address what you’re missing in your relationship with yourself first
Realise that things change – and that you may also need to change too
Explore, share – yourself – your inner-most self
Continually relate with a partner; seek ways to connect, to understand
Speak up. More importantly listen up
Ensure your words and actions are positive and that they match one another
If how you feel, think, speak and act all match you’ll feel much more content
Take a relationship beyond the physical; expand to the mental, then the divine.

See more on how to do this in the free ebook!
Have you found it on this site yet?

What others say about love…

Much has been said of love: it is the subject of songs, poems, books, movies and more. Here are some comments from other people that we have found helpful:

  • “You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams,” Dr. Seuss
  • “The power of life is love,” Leo Tolstoy
  • “A baby is born with a need to be loved—and never outgrows it,” Frank Clark
  • “The hunger for love is much more difficult to remove than the hunger for bread,” Mother Teresa
  • “Love one another and you will be happy. It’s as simple and as difficult as that,” Michael Leunig
  • “To love is to receive a glimpse of heaven,” Karen Sunde
  • “We waste time looking for the perfect lover, instead of creating the perfect love,” Tom Robbins
  • “God does not command that we do great things, only little things with great love,” Mother Teresa
  • “We are entitled to receive only what we are prepared to give,” Gordon Livingstone
  • “It is not how much we give, but how much love we put into giving,” Mother Teresa
  • “Nothing in life is as complex or rewarding as our intimate relationships. We have all been through some of the deepest pains and greatest joys while connecting closely to another human being. Real love is the highest form of giving. And it is also where we achieve the most inner personal growth. Thus, to fully love another person is perhaps one of the most divine experiences on earth.” Sage & Anthony Robbins

What’s a man to do?

You’ve probably realised that women tend to be different to men when it comes to love (besides from the obvious anatomy) and that most men are not good at understanding women, let alone love.

A good friend who was dating told us he was just going to be himself and if a woman liked him that was “great” and if not “it wasn’t meant to be”. The problem was that it took us years to get to know him, who he really was and how loving and caring a person he is. So how could he expect a potential partner to realize that in a date or two? How could he show that he was strong, yet sensitive – and more?

Here are 10 tips that helped him and can help MEN FIND LOVE.

To change you need to realise that you might have to change a few things; or more accurately expand your way of thinking and what you do.

Author and pick-up guru Neil Strauss proffers to men that they should learn to become, and demonstrate, that they are the most interesting person in a room in order to interest potential partners. A big part of this is showing that they understand intangible things, such as love.

Tip 1   We’re all attracted to and want to be with people who make us feel good. That’s why you like being with your mates, they make you feel good. When it comes to your partner, do you currently make her feel good about herself? Answer truthfully. If not, can you? Of course you can! You’re a big strong man and can do anything.

Your partner most likely wants to feel that she’s the most important person, not just woman, in your life. This means that she would most likely appreciate being told that you care for her, that you love her, that you’re there for her – always. Speak up and say something nice. Don’t think it’s a matter of not saying anything.

Some men have learnt that they can’t seem to say the right words to the women in their life. So they end up saying very little, if anything at all – especially nothing complimentary or deep and never how they feel. Well, this might be the biggest mistake you’re currently making.

It’s an easy one to fix. What you actually need to do is to say lots! Giving loving words, appreciation, is important. It’s how you give energy. You need to tell your partner that you love her, what you love most about her – there has to be something about her that you still like, even if it’s you just saying what you like the most about her physical appearance. Tell her what you find sexy about her. Then move onto those aspects of her personality that you appreciate. What attracted you to her in the first place? It’s probably still there. These words need to be heartfelt. Words without feeling won’t do it.

You can also show appreciation by giving in other ways, such as giving chocolates, flowers or jewellery.

But remember, these are physical things and while they might help a little it’s the intangible things that work best. (Recall how energy doesn’t flow in physical things, it’s stored.

For the other nine tips see the free e-book here 

Keys to a love-filled life

Many secrets and keys to love have been revealed in our book (free online or purchase a hard copy, just google).
They are summarised here:

  • Love is energy
  • There are different types of love
  • We each have unique energy patterns, as individual as fingerprints, that can do unique things
  • Your soul is related to the energy patterns within you
  • You are the one who controls your energy
  • You cannot always control what happens, but you can control how you respond to it
  • Emotions are energy in motion
  • Letting go equates to letting energy flow
  • Energy flows where attention goes
  • To change your circumstances change your energy flow
  • Doing things in a ‘loving’ manner is energetically easier than doing them any other way
  • Happiness and love are the rewards for getting your energies flowing together harmoniously
  • True love starts from within, with your energy
  • Only by letting love energy flow can you find with whom it best meshes
  • To find your soul mate you need to find whom your energy meshes with best
  • Love with your soul not just your body
  • You are drawn to people who make you feel good
  • If you can’t share the innermost essence of you with yourself, how are you ever going to share it with another?
  • One of the biggest secrets of true love is not to wait for love, not to ask for it and not to need it, but rather to simply give it
  • A great lover is always ready to give love and is not bothered whether it is returned or not
  • Love brings out what is hidden within you: if there is nothing loving, then your love will be nothing
  • True love has no conditions, no opposites.
  • You can’t bargain for true love
  • Your relationship to love is often a reflection of your relationship to yourself
  • Strong relationships depend on strong awareness of your self and of others
  • Don’t settle for average. True love is not average: it is extraordinary!
  • Make love with your whole being, your body, your head, your heart – your soul
  • True love is not static: it flows, expands, balances – grows. This means you have to too!

See more here…

How do you know?

Once you’ve found someone how do you really know you’ve found the ‘right’ person?
We’ve found signs include:

  • Wanting to give love unconditionally to your partner
  • Providing a safe and secure environment and supporting them through good and bad times
  • Being able to talk, and listen, together for hours
  • Sharing your inner most self, your hearts
  • Having similar attitudes and aims
  • Encouraging your partner to be themselves and being able to accept who they are
  • Realizing that every aspect of you meshes or ‘clicks; with and adds to that of your partner
  • Together you explore, discover, learn, experience and achieve much more than you could on your own
  • You are separate, but integrated, adding to each other’s energy, life and love; and
  • Your love is better than the songs and movies you used to associate with love.

Learn more, much more about finding your true love in the free ebook – right here!

Love in 2021

Are you ready for love in 2021?
Everything, including love, changes throughout your life.
You’ll progress through different stages and as you do your relationships and love will change too.
There are at least four phases you might progress through. These include:
• Student phase – during which you learn about yourself and the world, where your energy expands from physical to mental
• Family and social phase – where you comprehend meaning from what you’ve learnt, where your energy expands and connects
• Contribution phase – where you apply the information you’ve learnt, where you give energy
• An integration phase – where you integrate yourself, and your energy, with the world around you.
These phases involve a transition from a focus on the physical, to the emotional then to the mind, spirit and finally to love.

Find out more about these stage, along with lots of practical tops on how to find love – all free. Click here. 

SPECIAL BONUS – the meaning of life

To help us get all through COVID, we’re offering a special bonus – giving away our book THE ULTIMATE MEANING OF LIFE.
Even with access to more information than ever before, we still have few answers to life’s big questions. We can find all sorts of information on the Internet, but still can’t find practical answers to life’s big questions of:

  • Who am I?
  • Why was I born?
  • What should I be doing in life?
  • What’s the meaning of my life?
  • Is there life after death?

Despite our differences, these are questions we all ask and have been asking them for thousands of years. Yet there have been few objective answers to these big questions—until now.
Read more here – free for a limited time.