A secret of true love is to not look for differences, but rather to create connections.
What do you tend to do? Do you focus on differences between you and others? If you look for and focus on differences that’s what you’ll find. Or do you seek and build connections? Look for things in common then you’ll find them.
How do you connect?
Unfortunately, today’s modern lifestyle sees more of us connect less than ever before. Mobile phones and texts, the internet and emails, sees people communicate indirectly rather than in person.
But it’s through personal connection that you meet people and find out with whom you can connect best. A 2011 survey by Relationships Australia found the majority of people met their partners:
- through friends,
- at social occasions, or
- at work.
Only 4% met their partner online.
It also noted the main challenge to finding a partner is meeting enough new people.
As the adage suggests, it takes a lot of kissing frogs to find a prince. It can be challenging – even painful – meeting, dating and realising that someone is not quite the person you seek and then breaking up with them. Dealing with other people is the hardest thing you will ever do. The first person to climb Mt. Everest, Sir Edmund Hilary, said this was harder for him than climbing the world’s tallest mountain, he once told Guy. But you have to do it to meet people. It is that simple and that hard. Remember the anonymous quote that says “great love and great achievements involve great risk”.
How much of yourself are you prepared to risk? You need to be active, courageous and willing to talk to people. You need to be brave and risk rejection!
You need to get out there, meet and talk to people, connect with people.
When talking to someone ask them about themselves; people generally like to be asked and talk about themselves. Use this to your advantage by asking a question or two to get a conversation going. Then listen. Then try to sense if there is any connection and build on it.